Burning the Past – A Detachment Spell for Cleansing Pain

Do you have an ex-lover, friend or trauma that you want to let go of to create a space to welcome new people and opportunities? Don’t know what spell to use?

Moving forward can feel impossible when you are stuck with memories or objects that remind you of a past world.

So if you are looking to walk away from the past and detach from it completely, the best way to do so is by performing a  detachment spell, that gets rid of the pain you feel without harming anybody else.

“Creating spells like this can eliminate any harmful thoughts and burn any negative feelings that you think you may have attracted.”

The ritual itself is simple and can be done with just a few supplies that you can find at home.

Once you complete a ritual, you will have cleared your way of emotional pain and created a space for new relationships, sources of money, health, and spiritual growth.

Ready to attract abundance and new beginnings? Let’s dive in!

detachment spell

How To Use A Detachment Ritual To Get Rid of Bad Luck, Literally

Burning the past can be the most effective way of attaching yourself to the present. It makes us look forward to what is on the way towards us and prepares us for welcoming it.

For this, we need to cut and clear any energy that prevents us from moving forward.

How do I clear unwanted energy to welcome a new one?

There are different spells you can practice, each one depending on the energy you are seeking to clear and the energy you want to replace it with. For instance, if you want to attract a lover, the ritual you carry out will be a bit different than the one you would do to attract a job, money, love or friends.

Woman holding bowl of sage and clear oil to carry out ritual

5 Detachment Spells to Let Go Of Emotional Pain

Now, let’s take a look at the 5 spells you can practice for letting go of the past and aligning with the energy you seek to attract today.

The Cord Cutting Ritual for a past relationship

To allow yourself to attract change, you will have to cut ties with energy that doesn’t serve you anymore, just as you would with a person or an object.

Harnessing the energy you want to have in your life is part of the law of attraction. If you want to search about how to get started with the process, I’ve written an article on the law of attraction and how to make it your ally.

Woman carrying out sage ritual with bowl and clear oil

There is no better way to clear yourself of unwanted energy than with the cord cutting ritual.

“This is when you throw away the cord of a past relationship, place, or object that you feel is wrong in your world.”

Also known as a cut and clear ritual, it is best practiced with relationships in mind, it can also be used to detach you from fear, hurt or addictions.

These cut and clear spell works can be done mentally, or physically with real-life scissors and thread.


To carry it out mentally, simply close your eyes and wait. Then envision yourself sending a message to a specific person through a cord.

Picture yourself cutting the cord that includes all the negative aspects of that relationship, and proceed to visualize it happening for as long as you wish before continuing with your day.

It is recommended that you carry out the ritual physically where you can actually see yourself cutting the cord.

The 10 steps of performing clear deatchment spells

Woman carrying out cut and clear spell with clear oil

  1. Gather the essential ingredients for the ritual

You will need a black candle, white sage, water, black cotton thread or yarn, scissors, and a cauldron or fire safe container.

  1. Clear your space of unwanted negative energy

    Open all windows and doors and create a sacred area by burning sage and spraying water.

  2. Light the candle and position yourself at the center

    Think about what no longer serves you and you’d like to get rid of.

  3. Take the thread and attach your feet together with it

    This is you personifying what is holding you back from moving forward.

  4. Think or say out loud, “This is what is preventing me from moving on in life”

    Start to visualize those things embedded in the thread.

  5. Attach your hands together with another piece of thread

    This is you personifying what is stopping you from attracting what you seek.

  6. Think or say out loud, “This is what blocks me from receiving what I want”

    A piece of advice is to start to visualize those things embedded in the thread.

  7. Meditate with the thoughts of a relationship, experience, place, or feeling that no longer serves you

    Let all of the energy that you no longer want to possess be absorbed by the thread.

  8. Cut the cord as soon as you feel ready

    Removing the cord with the energy it has now taken will act as a clear spell to detach you and your body from it.

  9. Burn the thread and dispose of the ashes somewhere near your home.Finally, the cord in the flame that you form, and feel yourself experience the release and freedom with detaching from anything that kept you stuck with an ex relationship, place, feeling or thing.

The Detachment Ritual

Woman carrying out ritual

Many times, we feel unable to walk away from something that no longer serves us, but don’t know why.

The best time to perform a detachment spell that can throw those unwanted energies away from our space is during a full moon.

In a recent article, I spoke about how to carry out a moon ritual for manifestation.

The full moon will help you release thoughts and feelings that you don’t align with anymore. It is a perfect burning ritual to detach yourself from an ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend and prepare you for a new relationship.


  1. On a full moon’s night, light a black candle and invite the energy of the Universe, your spirit guides, and your divine self.
  2. Then, grab a piece of paper and write on it everything that you’d like to detach yourself from, such as a lover, a feeling, or a thought. Now sit in the middle of the candle.
  3. Place the piece of paper above the candle flame and burn it. As you watch the paper burn, think or say out loud, “I release that which doesn’t serve me any longer.”
  4. After the candle has burned the paper, you can soak your hands in a bowl of water to symbolize the cleansing of your system, knowing that you are now ready to welcome exactly what you seek under the full moon’s presence.

Did you know that people and situations aren’t the only types of stuff you can detach yourself from? You can subscribe to this YouTube channel where I recently posted a video on how to do a news and social media detox, which is essential to your spiritual well-being in the digital age.

The Self Love Ritual

Rose Quartz being used for self love ritual

While we may think that an ex romantic or platonic relationship served to fulfill us, there is nothing more important than the love we cultivate for ourselves.

To get started with one of the best self love spells, you will need:

  • pen
  • rose water
  • rice paper
  • lavender
  • sea salt
  • incense
  • candle (preferably a pink one)


  1. During a full moon, create four sheets of rice paper, and on each one write down a list of what you most love about yourself according to the four elements of life: Earth, Air, Water and Fire. The four elements indicate different traits of yourself that you will need to identify.
  2. For earth, you can write down what you like about yourself physically, and why you’re grateful for your body.
  3. For fire, you can note down what achievements you’re proud of, for air you can list what you love about your mind, and for water, you can mention what you admire about your social life and relationships.
  4. Fill your bathtub with a bit of rose water and sea salt. Throw in your earth list, and then light some lavender incense, followed by dropping your air list in the tub.
  5. Then, light your pink candle and throw the fire list into the tub, followed by your water list. As the candle burns, enter the bathtub and soak yourself in the tub of self-love you’ve created for about 20-25 minutes.

“The self love ritual is a chance to celebrate yourself and your uniqueness, which may include your characteristics, vision, and purpose.”

It is like food for your soul, and lets you burn anything that isn’t serving your sense of self love in the present moment.

If you’re unsure about your soul’s purpose and have been needing some guidance, you can check out this free soul manifestation reading that will reveal the path your soul is on right now.

The Manifestation Ritual

Head of woman clipping paper on a vision board

The period after we break up with a person, or let go of a friend that only supply us with negative energies is a great time in which to consider creating a manifestation or vision board.

Creating a vision board is very easy, and is the best way to bring the things you wish to manifest to real life in a matter of seconds or minutes. It allows you to bring together creative energy surrounding your intentions and goals for the very near future.

“Other than creating a board, you can make little vision flashcards and place any images, quotes, or writings on the paper to carry around with you.”

How to create a vision board

  1. To create a vision board, gather a bunch of index cards, scissors, glue, tape, and a few magazines. To add more variety to your pictures, you can also use the internet and then print them out. I’ve previously written about how to manifest with a pen and paper, which you can do if you want to centralize focus on particular intentions.
  2. Now, you want to think about which parts of your life that you’d like to address or attract something new for, such as a new business, a creative pursuit, loyal relationships, health, or travels. It is just like shopping for, or advertising exactly what you need to attract into your life at a given moment.
  3. It’s your vision board, so you are allowed to add any thoughts or pictures on the paper that align with what you care deeply about.
  4. Each picture or thought can correspond to each intention you have in mind.
  5. A good companion for your vision board are affirmations, which reassure you that you are on the right path every time you look at your vision board.
  6. You can peek at your collage board or paper every day as you think or speak these affirmations. The energy of vision boards is best harnessed during a new moon, making you fully focus on your vision.

If you’re looking to search for a sense of self that you have the potential to attract, check out this free, personalized moon reading to learn how to cultivate exactly what is meant for you.

The Rose Quartz Friendship Ritual

Friends performing friendship ritual

When was the last time you carried out a ritual with your friends?

Let’s suppose that you have gone through the detachment process and are now busy trying to work on attracting what it is you seek. You may want to focus on your projects or friendships.

But sometimes, a feeling of sadness can hit you when you least expect it, such as when you come across energy that may remind you of an ex partner, friend, or unwanted situation.

This is where the Rose Quartz Friendship ritual steps in, which is also known as a friendship spell hoodoo.

The best part about this ritual is that it includes crystal healing, and crystals can be carried out at any time during the day. Some of the best ways to use these crystals are by storing them in your bag or pocket.

If you are just starting out with crystals and want to know which ones to collect at the most affordable price, check out this blog post on the 10 cheapest crystals for beginners.

Rose Quartz is a stone that is known as the love crystal, and is able to unlock your heart’s energy specifically for healing and protection.


  1. To start with, select a few pieces of Rose Quartz for you and each of your closest friends. Then wash the stones with cold water and sea salt to cleanse their energy and charge them under the light of the full moon.
  2. Placing the Rose Quartz in the middle, you and your friends can surround them as you form the shape of a ring, preferably during a full moon at night. Then, take turns passing the stones clockwise to one another, as you complete a full circle.
  3. As each one of your friends holds onto each stone, she should think and set a specific intention for one of the friends within the circle.
  4. By the end of the ritual, you and each one of your friends will have your own piece of magic quartz that has been embedded with personalized love and energy. You can later place all these stones collectively into a bowl.

At the end of the day, being at a site of sharing your love with each person of your community will remind you of the love you have and feel for yourself, detaching yourself from that which no longer aligns with you.

Woman meditating during ritual with clear oil


What is a burning ceremony?

A burning ceremony is a way of releasing the past, and all the negative and torturous thoughts and feelings that came along with it. Burning ceremonies have been used throughout time as a detachment spell ritual in a lot of religious and spiritual practices, usually during a full moon at night.

What does burning a letter mean?

When you write a burn letter to yourself or someone else, you releasing any hurt or fear that is preventing you from moving from the past. It helps you heal old wounds, pain or trauma that are no longer good for you and your purpose.

How do you do a release ceremony?

The best way to carry out a releasing ritual or ceremony is to rest as you focus on yourself and your own intention and purpose for the future. A release ceremony is all about letting you find your personal goals and desires, while acknowledging and letting go of the parts of you that no longer serve you.

What is a burning ceremony called?

A burning ritual is also known as a “homa” or a sacrifice ritual. It is known as this because the fire destroys the offerings that are being made, such as grains, milk, incense or seeds.

Head of woman bathing after ritual


After completing your chosen detachment spell ritual, you may feel a surge of energy building up inside and around you, which is normal as you are in the process of exchanging one energy for another.

The ritual you decide to carry out will depend on what it is that you are looking to attract.

If you want to detach from energy that you are eager to let go of, the cord cutting and detachment rituals are what you need to get started.

If, instead, you are after manifesting a certain type of new energy, such as love or wealth, you can practice the self love, manifestation and Rose Quartz friendship rituals.

Don’t forget that the rituals serve as physical manifestations of your changing thoughts and feelings, so choose each ritual wisely.

When you start to experience great change in your life by feeling detached from negative energy and attracting positive vibes, you know your spell has done its job.

Do you have a favorite detachment spell ritual you’d most like to try? Let me know in the comments!


Picture of Angelina Der Arakelian

Angelina Der Arakelian

As an author and creative entrepreneur, Angelina loves using words to help people make sense of a place we call the Universe. She is the founder of Soul Craft, where she explores topics such as conscious creativity, energy and the law of attraction, all of which can be used to design one's own reality. Read more articles by Angelina here.

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